Great Questions to Ask Your Potential Surrogate Before a Final Decision

Great Questions to Ask Your Potential Surrogate Before a Final Decision

The decision to move forward with surrogacy is a giant leap for the intended parents and it requires thorough brainstorming and preparation ethically, physically and emotionally. The most prominent thing for a successful birth via surrogacy is to find a potential surrogate mother who will carry, deliver and hand over your baby safe throughout the journey.

To find the perfect fit for your pregnancy, it is advisable to clarify several factors with the surrogates before you make your final call.

Basic yet important questions to ask your potential surrogate:

Below are some of the salient questions that are required to take your first step to confirm your surrogate.

  • Ask about the basic stuff like her living place, her work and her interests.

Before you get committed to a surrogacy process, you need to know about what the surrogate does for a living, where the surrogate lives and what hobbies she has. This will be helpful to build a rapport, at the same time gives you an idea whether the surrogate can carry your baby with ease without pressure from other sources like work life, etc.

  • What is your current health condition?

It is advisable to get detailed information on the surrogate mother’s fitness and her health conditions. Does she have any allergies or take any medications currently? Through this, you can further analyze if the current medical conditions have adverse effects on the pregnancy.

  • How many children do you have? Have you been pregnant in the past?

Ask the surrogate questions like these to know if she is capable now and further questions to know if she had any complications during her past pregnancies; if she was able to carry the child till birth. This will also help you to understand if there will be any childcare expenses to take care of her children during or immediately after the pregnancy.

  • What is your driving force to become a surrogate?

Surrogates love to help others and they love to undergo the feeling of pregnancy, which is why most surrogates are willing to carry the baby for others. By asking the above question, you will know if the surrogate is passionate enough to happily deliver your child or if she is doing because of monetary pressure from the family side (in which the latter is dangerous as in this case the surrogate doesn’t have interest and it may affect the child’s growth).

  • What are your food preferences? What is your lifestyle?

Knowing about her food habits, allergies, if she drinks alcohol or smokes, takes any drugs, if she is addicted to caffeine, will explain her lifestyle. If she is into an unhealthy habit, ask her how she is planning to quit, if she is willing to change according to your preferences.

  • How do you want the communication to take place between us during the entire process?

It is good to know how she prefers to reach you in case of emergency; if she is okay to meet you often before, during or after the pregnancy, how she etc.

Advanced or critical questions to ask your potential surrogate:

Since California is a surrogacy friendly state, there will be many surrogates available. After getting satisfying answers to the basic questions, the below questions will help to eliminate any further doubts and move forward to find a suitable surrogate in California. If you still have concerns about her health, don’t worry, her health records will clear all your secondary thoughts.

  • Can we meet your guardian (parents or significant family member or spouse or partner)?

If possible, schedule an appointment to meet with the family member of the surrogate to understand how they accept the surrogacy, if there are any concerns, etc. This is because the surrogate mother should be in a peaceful stress-free environment to have a healthy pregnancy.

  • What would be the case if IVF results in more than one child? Is she okay to carry more than one child in her womb?

During in-vitro fertilization, there is a possibility of producing more than one healthy child. So, it is important to discuss this option with your surrogate. In case as the intended parents, you wish to have more than one child, ask the surrogate if she is ready to conceive all of them.

  • Are you willing to provide or pump breast milk?

Breast milk from the birth parent is the healthiest food for a newborn. You can ask the surrogate mother if she will be willing to pump milk for your child for a significant period. If not, you can look for other options such as milk donors or milk inducing options.

  • Does she need counselling service? Have you been a surrogate in the past?

A surrogate could already have delivered her children, but the surrogacy journey is different. She is coming forward to carry a child on someone else behalf. So, her mental state will be compromised. So, it is better to ask if she needs counselling service to discuss the process and to prepare her to approach the pregnancy happily. If she had already been a successful surrogate, then it is one strong positive point to consider her to fulfill your surrogacy process.

Who will ask crucial questions on your behalf?

Some of these questions will be too hard to ask directly as they may offend the surrogate or hurt her emotions, so they can be routed through a surrogacy agency. It is also good to discuss her expectation and her reaction towards unforeseen circumstances like the change of pregnancy decisions by parents, etc.

Made in the USA Surrogacy agency having various branches in California will act as a professional mediator between you and the surrogate throughout the surrogacy process. They help you to connect to the best surrogate in California and will guide you to communicate with the surrogate mother and to have a fruitful pregnancy.

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